bitch I'm the bomb, like tick tick

I have tried, despite everything, to be calm. To keep a good head on my shoulders, to breathe in and out, and to be pleasant and happy, after all I work with kids, I'm not allowed to slip.
One thing that pulls a pin out of a grenade of my sanity the fastest is ultimatums. Don't make them with me. My natural instincts are to choose the option you don't want, just out of spite of the audacity one must have to actually think backing someone into a corner will work.
Women fought for equal rights, we now have the same pay and same jobs as men, we can vote and we aren't expected to open our legs on demand and pump out babies while the men bring home the bread (for the next day, obviously, because dinner is already on the table).
I'm so sick of men talking behind backs and deciding the future and the next steps. It's one thing to ask about advice, it's another entirely to pick and choose the future. I'm sorry, I mean BOYS, because men don't pull that crap.
I'm tired of feeling like I have no voice, or my voice is the same decibel of a giraffe's and is completely ignored. I try to explain myself, and get no response. I keep my mouth shut and just float along, and my future gets decided for me?? I'm sorry sweethearts, but that's not how things go down. Alphamales get fought and taken down periodically, for a change of pace. I definitely think it's time for a change of pace.
It would be lovely to go back in the past, knowing what I know now, and rip it all to shreds and stop history from becoming what it is, but that doesn't happen. We live in the present and look to the future. I have choices for the future, I have numerous options, and it seems like I keep choosing the wrong one. When you have a choice between two people, and one puts a limitation and a time frame for discussions of the future, you keep your mouth shut, until others get involved, run their mouths and suddenly I would enjoy nothing more then Tom Cruise to pop out in full gear and end things. Granted, he was pro world in that movie but at this moment it makes no difference. And the gull one has, to resort to such a petty vault of communication. No, I wont slander your name or change your identity.. but the faith I had in you has shredded to bits. The respect I had for you is annihilated, and you took others down with you. THEN try to tell ME to think of the others? You mean the others who character you completely diminished in my mind? (Not to lie, they did a pretty good job of it themselves, you just finished off the job). To add icing on the cake, you claim to be the complete opposite of another situation, where yes, you knew some information but the only person who knew the whole ordeal would be the two people involved.. There are reasons for the chances I took, and the forgiveness I've shown. Correct me if I'm mistaken BUT one was shown equal amount of forgiveness, and in other situations that forgiveness wasn't nailed into the ground. Equal amount of promises were broken, there was more communication in this situation, but that doesn't make it POSITIVE communication. Infact, it was the opposite in most cases.
I'm not a saint, but neither are you. You are not my boss, an elderly, or a family member. What in the WORLD gives you the idea you have authority over me? Am I expected to grovel and bow, maybe kiss a few toes? Because that ain't happening, dig?
There is standing up for yourself, and there is shattering kneecaps. There are elegant ways of communicating such things, and there are the complete opposite. Glad you took the high road!!
I am not, for the record, slandering names or diminishing characters, I am, however, taking the opportunity to express myself in an outlet I know you will see, and in a way that those involved know what I am talking about, those not, do not. If one wont listen to me any other way and actually FORBID me to contact them in certain ways (sorry darling, you forgot blog) then I will find the loophole. Capiche?
You've stated which options will lead to which assumptions.
Don't ever give me anymore time lines. I work at my own pace, sorry it isn't as quick as yours. If you seriously want what you say you want, and to keep a "friendship" running, then. I. need. time. Make whatever assumptions you would like, quite frankly, I don't care. Whoever is affected have no one to blame but themselves really. I'm glad you have the backbone to make your own decisions and not be influenced so deeply. Hey ho, I may even be proving points as I type. Yes, I'm a bitch. Get over it. Yes, you pushed me to this point. Let it go. Yes, I've reached breaking point. Ta da. Isn't it glamorous? Congrats, you guys called it. You also caused it. There's a reason for you to get right hammered this weekend. Embrace it. It's the last freebie you get in this respect. You ran out of the other freebies months ago.

How's that for crazy/beautiful??